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taker97 07-08-2019 10:40 AM

Sad Truth
 
Used to run a successful business in oil & gas sector. Knew a fellow businessman man since 2010 who is elderly and we partnered together in many projects successfully. We used to call each other daily, meet weekly twice have dinner blah blah blah, go over to each other houses .I would say he was a very close n dear friend to me.

2017 my business closed down and he too stopped his business. We kept in touch but not as often.Just yesterday I met him for lunch after 1 year and we had completely NOTHING to talk about. The lunch was very formal with alot of awkward silences. Yea we spoke the usual stuff like family, wat am i doing now etc. As we sat and ate our food, i could recollect all the happy and stressful moments we had together.

I felt that we have lost touch and what we used to have or share wasn't there any more. Not that I and he was arrogant, or i owed him money or we had some bad blood.

Its just that the whole relationship was built on business and grew into friendship, but the very friendship became dusted once business is no longer there.

Anyone have a similar experience.

maxsee 07-08-2019 12:24 PM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by taker97 (Post 19046759)
Used to run a successful business in oil & gas sector. Knew a fellow businessman man since 2010 who is elderly and we partnered together in many projects successfully. We used to call each other daily, meet weekly twice have dinner blah blah blah, go over to each other houses .I would say he was a very close n dear friend to me.

2017 my business closed down and he too stopped his business. We kept in touch but not as often.Just yesterday I met him for lunch after 1 year and we had completely NOTHING to talk about. The lunch was very formal with alot of awkward silences. Yea we spoke the usual stuff like family, wat am i doing now etc. As we sat and ate our food, i could recollect all the happy and stressful moments we had together.

I felt that we have lost touch and what we used to have or share wasn't there any more. Not that I and he was arrogant, or i owed him money or we had some bad blood.

Its just that the whole relationship was built on business and grew into friendship, but the very friendship became dusted once business is no longer there.

Anyone have a similar experience.

There aren't no such things as friendship when it comes to work or bizness at least for me, can't say for others. Anyway, U 2 share common ground last time when u r cooperating in a bizness. Of coz you will feels like there are endless things to talk about and are willing to share stuffs.

Now that both of you are no longer in the same boat, this so called "close" friendship is non existant. It is normal, just get over it.:o

fallen11 07-08-2019 08:27 PM

Re: Sad Truth
 
how about talking which ktv is fun and value for $$$?:D

Highjoys 07-08-2019 09:17 PM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by taker97 (Post 19046759)
Used to run a successful business in oil & gas sector. Knew a fellow businessman man since 2010 who is elderly and we partnered together in many projects successfully. We used to call each other daily, meet weekly twice have dinner blah blah blah, go over to each other houses .I would say he was a very close n dear friend to me.

2017 my business closed down and he too stopped his business. We kept in touch but not as often.Just yesterday I met him for lunch after 1 year and we had completely NOTHING to talk about. The lunch was very formal with alot of awkward silences. Yea we spoke the usual stuff like family, wat am i doing now etc. As we sat and ate our food, i could recollect all the happy and stressful moments we had together.

I felt that we have lost touch and what we used to have or share wasn't there any more. Not that I and he was arrogant, or i owed him money or we had some bad blood.

Its just that the whole relationship was built on business and grew into friendship, but the very friendship became dusted once business is no longer there.

Anyone have a similar experience.

Well, I have seen similar things before. When business is doing well and everyone is loaded, we will have a lot to talk with much satisfaction with personal achievements in earning high income... but when business failed and all sources of high income are gone, suddenly one becomes dejected and not so talkative.... everyone seems to be in gloom and it seems life lost some interest to some...

larue 07-08-2019 09:35 PM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Its just the one time. I bet things will get back on track if you continue to spend time together. Don’t be quick to write it off. With my best friend even, some days things are just off. Don’t sweat it if you value his friendship.

It’s like erectile dysfunction, just because it happens once doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not working.

loneyheart 10-08-2019 12:03 AM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Once u get older n older u get lesser thing to talk unless u want to talk abt yr past history
Go down to Chinatown n observe those old man they ether sat down there whole day to watch
Even they have a game of chess in wordless

Senegal 10-08-2019 02:06 AM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by larue (Post 19049124)
Its just the one time. I bet things will get back on track if you continue to spend time together. Don’t be quick to write it off. With my best friend even, some days things are just off. Don’t sweat it if you value his friendship.

It’s like erectile dysfunction, just because it happens once doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not working.

Wow what a comparison! :D

peanodood1337 15-08-2019 11:43 AM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by taker97 (Post 19046759)
Used to run a successful business in oil & gas sector. Knew a fellow businessman man since 2010 who is elderly and we partnered together in many projects successfully. We used to call each other daily, meet weekly twice have dinner blah blah blah, go over to each other houses .I would say he was a very close n dear friend to me.

2017 my business closed down and he too stopped his business. We kept in touch but not as often.Just yesterday I met him for lunch after 1 year and we had completely NOTHING to talk about. The lunch was very formal with alot of awkward silences. Yea we spoke the usual stuff like family, wat am i doing now etc. As we sat and ate our food, i could recollect all the happy and stressful moments we had together.

I felt that we have lost touch and what we used to have or share wasn't there any more. Not that I and he was arrogant, or i owed him money or we had some bad blood.

Its just that the whole relationship was built on business and grew into friendship, but the very friendship became dusted once business is no longer there.

Anyone have a similar experience.

If you guys have nothing in common other than the business, what do you expect after the business folded?

Its the same for your old school mates, your army buddies, ex-colleagues etc. You had the same goals, worked as a team, and shared experiences. Its easy to see them as close friends at that point in time.

But unless you make an effort to be involved in each other's lives, the relationship is superficial, and will end after your agendas do not align anymore.

sexfrenzy 16-08-2019 09:46 AM

Re: Sad Truth
 
Guess it's common. Had the same situation with my best friend since P1. Lost touch for 3-4 years when he was based overseas and when we catch up recently, aside from talking about his overseas experience, there was not much to talk about. Chemistry lost.

Recently i send a text wishing him Happy birthday and jio him for makan, he just replied thanks after a few hours and that's it. :confused:


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