Advice on divorce

[pickluss]

Hi, currently filing for divorce, and wife is asking for $2500 per month, and the whole ownership of the HDB.

My income is about $5000, and i will try to bring it down to about $1000-1500.

I have contributed about $50k to the HDB so far, am prepared to actually give it all up to her, more for the kids actually so that they are not disrupted.

Just want to check if the above is reasonable, if not, whats the generic norm for the situation? Appreciate your quick replies as i want to counter offer asap, thanks!

[kpkblppl2]

Whether is reasonable depends on your lawyer capabilities and the Judge verdict.

Suggest you read these threads.

https://www.sbf.net.nz/showth...=women+charter

https://www.sbf.net.nz/showth...hlight=divorce

https://www.sbf.net.nz/showth...614&highlight=

[sensualshirley]

Originally Posted by pickluss

Hi, currently filing for divorce, and wife is asking for $2500 per month, and the whole ownership of the HDB.

My income is about $5000, and i will try to bring it down to about $1000-1500.

I have contributed about $50k to the HDB so far, am prepared to actually give it all up to her, more for the kids actually so that they are not disrupted.

Just want to check if the above is reasonable, if not, whats the generic norm for the situation? Appreciate your quick replies as i want to counter offer asap, thanks!

All the best ya... let me know if u need sum1 to talk to...

[chirpydog]

do something that you won't believe and blow everyone's mind...

don't divorce... ask for forgiveness or release forgiveness, cancel the divorce and save all the money...

start all over again with your wife and kids..... it's worth it when you look back..

There are things that one will certainly regret... For woman , it's abortion. For man, it's divorce..

[itsabt6x]

It depends on the grounds for divorce. For me, I have no regrets at all. In settlement, I gave a lump sum & told her to F.O.

[pickluss]

Originally Posted by itsabt6x

It depends on the grounds for divorce. For me, I have no regrets at all. In settlement, I gave a lump sum & told her to F.O.

How did you come by the figure to the lump sum? Mind sharing? Was it contested?

[sadfa]

Originally Posted by pickluss

Hi, currently filing for divorce, and wife is asking for $2500 per month, and the whole ownership of the HDB.

My income is about $5000, and i will try to bring it down to about $1000-1500.

I have contributed about $50k to the HDB so far, am prepared to actually give it all up to her, more for the kids actually so that they are not disrupted.

Just want to check if the above is reasonable, if not, whats the generic norm for the situation? Appreciate your quick replies as i want to counter offer asap, thanks!

My advice is the best here. As usual.

You're not buying a flat or car.
Whether its reasonable is up to you, your income, your lifestyle.

No one here can decide for you.
You're old enough to make decisions for yourself

The worst is people act smart n say they pay 1 k nia n your lawyer is lousy.

And you want quick replies? Not only you want spoonfeeding, you want fast spoonfeeding? Choke la you.
_____________
Exchange points spoonfeeding ma?

[Bestie]

Been ding dong ding dong for divorcing the last 20 years......

As we age, child grown up, looking back, really bo liao......

Unless you wanted to start another marriage or your wife vice versa, lun la, nothing else is important to maintain a healthy family nucleus even just for show only.

[loststranger]

Originally Posted by Bestie

Been ding dong ding dong for divorcing the last 20 years......

As we age, child grown up, looking back, really bo liao......

Unless you wanted to start another marriage or your wife vice versa, lun la, nothing else is important to maintain a healthy family nucleus even just for show only.

If it's just for show then what's the point? If both still young might as well let each other for a chance to find their happiness again. That's IMHO.

[VincentnYu]

Hey bro, when you wrote 'more for the kids', can tell that you are still a loving Father. Not sure what is the real reason for your decision but like what others shared...try to give it another chance! However if you've made up your mind, we wish you all the best but must keep in touch with the children no matter what age they are.

[iossshee]

Bro listen to this ... if a woman nag at you ... she do care for you ... if she check on you means she been threaten and wanna protect her turf n her livelihood which is you.
Wanna divorce is ez ... but whats your plan later ... do you have enuff bullet$$$ to survive in this current property rate for rental.
Dun forget give 30% salary away every month only see your children once a week go shopping go eat . Do you think your balance 70% is enuff.
Please think twice and use white paper do the sum yourself.

[samster101]

My bff divorced with 1 young son. At the point of divorcing, he was so sure. So bitter. Had so much hatred. Rather give up his high paying job so that he can take a non travelling job to see his son 2 x on weekdays. He eventually re-married. Had another family. Another son. Then realized same old same old.

15 years later, I asked him if he regretted divorcing. He said Regret also no use. Done already. I can tell he did. Man is very stubborn. Won't admit wrong. Won't admit lose. When you cross mid 40s, you start to mellow. No energy to quarrel. No energy to hate. Just want to see your kids grow up. In his case, he now has to deal with the inconvenience of fathering his first son. His son suffered. Then, you realize all those bros who advised you to keep your first marriage were right.

Wisdom, unlike your bachelor or masters degree, is the ability to choose. I have often found it elusive in this forum.

[sadfa]

Originally Posted by samster101

My bff divorced with 1 young son. At the point of divorcing, he was so sure. So bitter. Had so much hatred. Rather give up his high paying job so that he can take a non travelling job to see his son 2 x on weekdays. He eventually re-married. Had another family. Another son. Then realized same old same old.

15 years later, I asked him if he regretted divorcing. He said Regret also no use. Done already. I can tell he did. Man is very stubborn. Won't admit wrong. Won't admit lose. When you cross into your 40s, you start to mellow. No energy to quarrel. No energy to hate. Just want to see your kids grow up. In his case, he now has to deal with the inconvenience of fathering his first son. His son suffered. Then, you realize all those bros who advised you to keep your first marriage were right.

Wisdom, unlike your bachelor or masters degree, is the ability to choose. I have often found it elusive in this forum.

You obviously don't read my posts
_________
Exchange points obvious ma?

[Travesty]

Marriage is scary

[thedevil666]

Originally Posted by samster101

My bff divorced with 1 young son. At the point of divorcing, he was so sure. So bitter. Had so much hatred. Rather give up his high paying job so that he can take a non travelling job to see his son 2 x on weekdays. He eventually re-married. Had another family. Another son. Then realized same old same old.

15 years later, I asked him if he regretted divorcing. He said Regret also no use. Done already. I can tell he did. Man is very stubborn. Won't admit wrong. Won't admit lose. When you cross mid 40s, you start to mellow. No energy to quarrel. No energy to hate. Just want to see your kids grow up. In his case, he now has to deal with the inconvenience of fathering his first son. His son suffered. Then, you realize all those bros who advised you to keep your first marriage were right.

Wisdom, unlike your bachelor or masters degree, is the ability to choose. I have often found it elusive in this forum.

nice advice indeed. im in this period also. but it takes two hands to release for a relationship to fall apart. it takes two hands to clap to make a sound too